Week 3 College Football Picks

Alright kids, last week was an utter failure. I mean, we were terrible. I think 2 people that picked here were over .500. But no reason to get down. I'm looking at this the way I feel when I lose my first golf ball (typically around hole 1), you've gotta sacrifice one to the Gods. Gamblor is a vindictive deity who requires his sacrifice and likes to remind us we dont have a damn clue what we are doing. Week 2 was essentially our collective shank into the water hazard. We can now move on knowing we have paid our tithe and reclaim our victorious mantle. Let's go:

Tennessee @ #1 Florida (-30)
Pick: UF -30
Gratuitously huge line? Sure is. I mean, that's a 5 score spread kiddies. I wouldn't blame you for taking the Vols here. But Florida got outplayed by Troy in the 1st half of last weeks game. Do you remember the final score of that bad boy? 56-6. UF is just that damn good. The Real Jonathan Crompton stood up last week against UCLA and showed how abhorrent he is. Tennessee best chance would come in UF getting bored, or looking past them for some reason. Sadly for Tennessee, UF is only in game 3, and next week is Kentucky. The Wildcats arent exactly a team you feel the need to gameplan for 2 weeks against. Oh wait, I'm also forgetting that the only thing Lane Kiffin has done since getting hired at Tennessee (besides collect recruiting violations) is take runs at the Gators. He's talked trash about Urban, he's tried to call out the Gators for cheating in recruiting, hell, his opening presser was punctuated by calling out a victory over UF this year. Not to mention we are in the Swamp this week. If there is one thing I've learned in my years of watching college football, it's that when playing an extremely better opponent, your best chance is to catch em off guard. The LAST thing you wanna do is piss em off. Yet all Kiffin has done since he showed up at Neyland is force the Gators to clean out their local Office Max's because they keep running out of room on their bulletin boards.

Texas Tech @ #2 Texas (-17.5)
Pick: Texas -17.5
Easily the most exciting play of last year was Michael Crabtree's (remember him?) last second touchdown. It vaulted Tech to national prominence, and ruined UT's shots at both a Big XII and National Title. The revenge factor alone clears at least 7 points in my mind for the Horns. Now add in that the game is in Austin, where thanks to renovations you can actually hear noise every now and then when the old people feel like making some, that's another standard 3 points right there. Then finally we get to the actual teams themselves. Tech lost their QB, and most of their WRs. Texas meanwhile returns essentially their entire D and most weapons on O, including most importantly Colt McCoy. My love for Mike Leach is not a secret. I think the guy is hilarious, and honestly, I like how he coaches. Sure he runs a niche O, but damn if it doesn't work. This year tho, well, it's the old don't poke the bull if you don't want the horns idea. Texas in a romp.

#3USC (-18.5) @ Washington
(Disclaimer: Line not up yet on CentSports, this came from Sportsbook)
Pick: Washington +18.5
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT? Oh, I said it kids. Be with me on this one. USC looked like crap against OSU. But Eddie, OSU is a top 10 team, UW won like, 3 games in the last 8 years, you are an idiot. Maybe so. HOWEVAH, Jake Locker, UW's QB, may be the most underrated player in college football today. Also, UW will not be surprised by what USC brings to the game because UW's new head coach, Steve Sarkisian, spend the last several years coaching under Pete Carroll at USC. The Huskies gave LSU a tough game and I expect the same here. USC will win this game by 14-17, but I don't see a 3 touchdown victory for Team Win Forever here.

#19 Nebraska @ #13 Virginia Tech (-5.5)
Pick: Nebraska +5.5
I just don't like VT. They looked ugly against Bama. That game was just plain sloppy. Nebraska meanwhile has been killing fools. Cupcakey fools no doubt, but they put it on em like they were supposed to. Beamerball just doesn't seem to work the same as it used to. VT plays tough at home, there is no doubt about that. But I expect the inherent beastness of Ndamukong Suh to cancel out any chicanery Tyrod Taylor may try. I mean, come on, the dude's name means House of Spears. That alone is worth taking the points.

Michigan St @ (miss you ranking #) Notre Dame(-10)
Pick: ND -10
Win or leave. MSU just lost to Central Michigan. No predictions, no trash talk, no gratuitous praise of Michael Floyd this week. Win or leave.

The comments are waiting for your picks, don't make them lonely.